1. How was mankind created?
We were created by God in the image of God, male and female together ( Genesis 1:27).
2. Who is the author of marriage?
When God presented the first bride, our mother Eve, to Adam, He was establishing the first marriage (Genesis 2:22).
3. After the first marriage, how are marriages to be formed?
A man should leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife so that they might become one flesh (Genesis 2:24).
4. What is the biblical standard for marriage?
One man devoted to one woman for life.
5. How do we know that such monogamy is the normal biblical standard?
We know this because God created one man and one woman for each other as a pattern (Genesis 2:24); because Christ is the ultimate bridegroom, and he has only one bride (Ephesians 5:23); and because Christian leaders are required to set the example of devotion to one woman only (1Timothy 3:2).
6. What elements are necessary to bring marriage into existence?
The two elements that are necessary are a public covenant of marriage (Genesis 2:22) and sexual consummation (Genesis 2:24) between to eligible participants (Genesis 12:10-20; Matthew 19:5; Ephesians 5:22-23).
7. What is it called if there is sexual consummation but no covenant?
It is called fornication or adultery (1Corinthians 6:16-18).
8. What is it called if there is a covenant but no consummation?
Conjugal union is an essential part of the marriage covenant (1Corinthians 7:1-5). This is part of the explicit meaning of what it means to become “one flesh.” The covenant is therefore consummated by the kind of sexual union that could, by God’s providential design, result in pregnancy (Matthew 19:9). Those who have not consummated a one-flesh union in this way may be roommates, or friends, or life partners, but they are not married by the biblical definition.
9. What is the relationship of being “one flesh” to the existence of a marriage?
There can be no marriage without it, but the mere fact of a one-flesh union does not automatically create a marriage. Other uses of sexual union are shameful (1Corinthians 6:15-16; Matthew 19:9) and violate the nature of this covenant. Such parodies of marriage are not themselves marriage.
10. Can genuine marriages be formed in disobedience?
Yes. One example would be remarriage after unjustifiable divorce (Deuteronomy 24:1-4). Another example would be found in societies where polygamy is legal.
11. Can the disobedience become profound enough that the end result is not marriage at all?
Yes. Homosexual “marriages” would be an example of this. Such unions are simply unnatural (Romans 1:24-28) and display a disobedience that God plainly presents as condemnation, not a covenant and a blessing.
12. Why are these marriages not marriages?
Because they are physically incapable of resulting in one flesh, which requires a male and a female. In Scripture, marriage is tied explicitly to the creation of mankind as man and woman (Matthew 19:5; Genesis 2:22-24). The union of one flesh is explicitly connected to the possibility of procreation (Genesis 1:27-28; Genesis 2:22-24). Other arrangements violate this order and cannot, therefore, be marriages under God’s design. They are mirages.
13. Why is heterosexual intercourse an essential part of the marriage covenant while other sexual activity (e.g., homosexual sexual activity) is not?
Such sexual activity is not the kind of thing that can ever culminate in a one-flesh union. Inside the covenant, and between eligible participants, human sexuality is an expression of God’s creation design (Genesis 2:22-24). Expressions of sexuality intended for mere pleasure or self-gratification reject God’s design and replace the Creator with the creation (Romans 1:21-25). These other expressions are therefore denials of God’s authority as the Creator of marriage.
14. Can the state create any other forms of marriage or change the Creator’s definition of marriage?
No. Foundational laws concerning marriage in any society must reflect God’s justice and attributes (Romans 13:1-10). Disobedient rulers may sometimes seek to overturn God’s order, which is neither new nor surprising, but it does not change God’s pattern.
15. What shall a Christian do when commanded by the State to accept another definition of marriage?
We should behave as the apostles did when commanded to disobey God by the rulers of Jerusalem, and choose to serve God rather than men (Acts 4:18-22).
16. How should we treat those who believe themselves to be in homosexual “marriages?”
We should treat everyone we know with love and respect, speaking the truth to them in love. But because they are demanding our approval above all, we must take care that our compassion and care never be confused with such approval.
17. How do we know that these things are true?
We know what God’s desire for marriage is through the revelation of Scripture, through the creation order, through natural law, and through the testimony of our own conscience. If we reject what he has revealed to us through any or all of these avenues, then at the day of judgment we will be left without excuse.
(This is taken from the book “Same-Sex Mirage” used here with the permission of the author).